Is intimacy worth it or is it just a false morel ?

While growing up, you are looking forward to getting to the day in which you can handle the wounds. You are hurt. so does everybody else. You seek escape from pain. You can't wait the arrival of the day in which you are tough enough to manage the blue moments of your life.
Then there you are. All grown up. mature enough to get in touch. You have heard many fairy tales of true friendship and great bonding. You are looking hard to find your fairy tale! That's where you make the biggest mistake. Life is damn real and fairy tales are not. You fall into a pattern of intimacy which does not exist. You have the dream. You start building up. Then you are hurt. one after each other. You lose your hope and start being pessimistic. You are looking for the cocktail hour. All you get is the mourning night !
You look for the non-judgmental good listener. All you get is an advice-giver. You wonder why your friend does not care about you as much as you care about the relationship. People come and go. People have got their own stories. You try and try and the chemistry doesn't always work. 
You start counting the numbers. counting the wounds. counting the people who have come to your life. How many relationships should you have to find the real one ? How many times are you going to experience the hardship of a break-up ?
Is intimacy worth it or is it just a false morel ? 
Are you trying too hard ? 
Isn't forgiveness the true mark of maturity ? How come you can't let the ones who hurt you back in your life ? Are you selfish or are you scared ?
The damn fairy tales confused us to death !